My School Day in a Coconutshell
by Tehflycat
Summary: The title explains all. A story/script that I made from my school day. It's drastically shortened, just saying. It's in Misc. Books because I am turning it into a storybook after I get enough.
1. March 3rd

Chapter UNO: 3/2/12

**Setting: Friend's (Kellie) house, walking to school.**

Me: Kellie, you really shouldn't have called those guys homos yesterday.

Kellie: But it WAS funny.

Me: Yeah.

**(A/N: Yesterday, we were walking to school, and these two guys from an all-guys school around the corner passed us. They were screeching like freaking BIRDS, and then Kellie screamed, HOMOS! Ah, good times.)**

Kellie: Imagine they tell their headmaster or something! THAT would be funny.

Me: What are they gonna do, track us down? Creeps.

**Setting: Auditorium, before school starts.**

Shannon (a friend): I GOTZ A PUPPY! :D

Me: I KNOW, SHE'S SOOOOO CUUUUUTE! Little puppy Camille(:

**Skip a few minutes...**

Me: (talking to self) I AM SO DAMN TIRED! D:

**Enter Madeleine**

Madeleine: BAD MORNING KAYLEIGHSUN! **(A/N: She TRIED to use a Japanese suffix on my name once, and it failed. Miserably. So now, i'm Kayleighsun and not just Kayleigh.)**

Me: MADELEINE. SHUT UP. I'm too tired for this. And sexy.

Maddy: Suuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuure...

**Enter Nora**

Nora: Hayyyy...

Me; PATTYY PLACEMAT! **(A/N: I gave everyone names from Soul Eater. I'm Kid, Nora's Patty, and Maddy's Black*Star.)**

Me: *Playing Tiny Tower*

Nora: OMG! I have that game TOO!

Me: Epic.

Nora: 'Cept I have 34 floors.

Me and Maddy: WHAT? How damn much do you play?

Nora: A lot.

**Setting: 3rd floor, at my locker.**

Me: UGHH! I am going to pass out.

Matt (a friend): Dude... Why?

Me: I got, like, 15 minutes of sleep.

Matt: Ohhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhh...

Kellie: Ok, you need to go to the nurse.

Me: NOOOO! She'll just give me ice and send me back to class!

Kellie: True, true. She's so stupid.

Me: You said it...

**Enter Stephanie**

Me: HAYYY STEFFO! **(A/N: We call Stephanie either Steffo or Crona, cuz we gave her the name of Crona.)**

Steffo/Crona: I have Mrs. Mil today.

Me: Damn.

**First period: AGP (Academically Gifted Program), in the basement.**

Me: *walks in*

Erin pops up and tries to scare me.

Erin: Oh, it's only Kayleigh.

Me: Why, who did you think it was?

Erin: Like, Zach or something.

Me: Oh.

Mrs. K: Ok, guess what we're doing today!

Class: *le gasp*

Mrs. K: Deductive reasoniiiiiiiiiiingggg!

Erin: YOU KNOW WE HATE DEDUCTIVE REASONING!

Mrs. K: We still have to do it!

**Second period: Orchestra, in the upstairs annex.**

Me: TINAAA~

Tina: Did Mrs. F say she was gonna be absent today?

Me: Yeah, why?

Tina: Cuz no one's up there and there's no sub.

Me: Who gives a shit?

Tina: True, true.

**Enter Alexa**

Alexa: HAYYY GURLL!

Me: HAYYYYY

Alexa: Why is there no one up here?

Me: Who cares?

Alexa: Not me.

Me: I'm sooooooooooooo tired... I'm gonna take my shoes off.

Alexa:... Why are you so tired?

Me: I didn't sleep at ALL last night.

Alexa: Why?

Me:... I don't know.

**Enter the bitchy sub**

BS: Ok, your teacher left written work. Do it.

**Enter Emily and Athena**

Emily: (to sub) Can I get a drink?

BS: No! Finish your work. Honestly, my FIRST graders do stuff like this.

Emily: Jeez, I just wanted a drink...

Me: (finished with first part of work) Can I get a drink?

BS: Didn't we just have this conversation? Honestly, grow up.

Me and Alexa: (under breath) !#%$^*&

Athena: You said it...

Me: (finished with all of my work) Can I go get a drink NOW?

BS: Ugh... fine.

Me: *running to fountain* They need to fix the fountain near the annex...

**Back in the annex...**

Alexa: Brendan's trying to go in the chute...

**(A/N: The chute is an empty, unused air duct.)**

Me: Watch him get stuck and we have to call an ambulance.

Me: I don't want to go to Dr. Crackhead's class...

Alexa: (mimicking our science teacher's [Dr. Crackhead's] annoying voice) MNEH MNEH MNEH! Do your work while I sit here and be fat! BJDVKHVIDSVCID!

BS: Who talks like that?

Alexa: (trying to think of an excuse) I always used to do that to her when we were little! **(A/N: I only became friends with her this year :P) **

BS: That's nice.

Me: Nice excuse!

Alexa: Right?

Me and Alexa: *cracking up*

**Third period: 3rd floor, Dr. Crackhead's (we call her that cuz no one likes her.) classroom, science.**

Actually, I don't know what happened, I was asleep...

**Fourth period: Ms. S's classroom, 2nd floor, math.**

Ms. S: Okay kids! take out your homework and compare it with your teammates.

Me: I hate my teammates. Well, I hate Joe.

Joe: Well, no one likes you, bastard.

Me: Whatever. At least I'm NORMAL.

Kellie: I'm not getting into this.

Me: I'm just going to ignore him.

Ms. S: Okay! Now, I'm going to give you a piece of poster paper, and you're going to write a THREE digit number on the top.

Joe: Hey, can we do 666?

Me, Kellie and Matt: NO! God damn freak...

Joe: Fine. We'll do 656.

Matt: Oh, crap! I have to go to lessons!

Me: K, bye.

Kellie: Joe, you're seriously a weirdo.

Joe: Whatever.

**Fifth period: Technology (woodshop and Tech), in the basement annex, Mr. T's room.**

Me: Too... Tired...

Rachel: You look like you got hit by a bus and stuck in a gutter.

Me: Gee, thanks.

Kellie and Rachel: GO TO THE NURSE!

Me: No.

**After this, I fell asleep... Again...**

**Sixth period: English, Mrs. Mil's room,** **second floor.**

I fell asleep... Yet again...

**Seventh period: Lunch, first floor, 8-person circular table, kitchen side (A/N: We have two lunchrooms, one with almost all 16-person tables, and the other has the place where you get your lunch and the 8-person tables.)**

Me: So... Hungry...

Clara: Goodness gracious, what happened to you? You look like you got hit by a bus.

Me: No shit, I didn't sleep last night.

Clara: Why?

Me: ...I don't know...

Lunch person: Go eat! **(A/N: that means that we go get on line for lunch.)**

Me: *Sprinting to lunch line*

Maddy: What's wrong with you?

Me: I'm so hungry I could eat Doc the Friendly Horse.**(A/N: Maddy went to this place, and she went horseback riding, and she had a horse called Doc the Friendly Horse. It was VICIOUS.)**

Maddy: AAH!

Nora: Eeewwwwww, I hate crust!

(it was grilled cheese day)

Me: GIVEITGIVEITGIVEITGIVEIT! (I also hate crust, but I was too hungry to think about this.)

Nora: jeez, okay. Calm down!

Me: *Nomming down on the grilled cheese*

Everyone: Fatty...

Me: Rude...

Maddy: here's 70 cents.

Me: GOODBYE! *goes to vending machine*

Maddy: ...?

Me: *comes back with a bag of barbeque chips*

Clara: CHIP BUDDIEZZ!

Me: O YA!

**Eighth period: Social Studies, 3rd floor, Mr. O**

Nothing happened in Social Studies. At all.

Chapter 1 END

**Ending Author's Note: Hi! So, what did you think of this? Was it good? I don't think this one was funny... I had to shorten it cuz the original was 5 times longer. I forgot to post this one before the last one so... This is the first one. Review PLEEEASEE!  
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-Tehflycat


	2. March 8th

Chapter DOS

3/8/12

**Setting: At Kellie's house, walking**

Kellie: I want chocolate covered strawberries…

Me: 'Kay.

Kellie: Jeez, what's wrong with you?

Me: I'm tired. And hungry. And I was thinking about the hellhole we call school.

Kellie: We do go to a hellhole school…

Me: I'm trying for no lunch detention this year. THAT didn't work so well last year…

Kellie: Ms. Salesi?

Me: SHE GAVE ME LUNCH DETENTION FOR FREAKIN' WRITING IN PENCIL!

Kellie: Really? That's f***** up.

Me: Right? AND she gave me and Clara lunch detention for passing notes.

Kellie: Wow.

Me: Yeah.

Kellie: We had Color Night on Monday. **(A/N: Color Night is a girl's event in April and it has Dance, Cheer, sports, Entrance, and all that shit.)**

Me:…No shit, Sherlock.

Kellie: That's my line!

Me: Since when? When have you EVER even SAID that?

Kellie: I've said that before…

Me: Ok. Sure. Whatever.

Kellie: Bastard.

**Setting: In the auditorium before school.**

Me: (in head) I'm tired. I should just take a nap. Wow, there are a lot of whores in our school… **(A/N: There were a bunch of girls wearing shorts… In the middle of Winter…)**

**Skip a few minutes.**

Madeleine: Hi.

Me: THANK GOD, you actually said something and didn't just come and yell in my ear today.

Madeleine: I should of.

Me: …

Madeleine: So I was on GirlSense…. Blablablablabla…

Me: Sorry, I can't hear you over the sound of how awesome I am.

Madeleine: CONCEITED! Ugh.

Me: You missed so much fun at lunch Tuesday and Wednesday.

Madeleine: Oh, joy.

Me: Oh, I have the check.

Madeleine: Oh yeah, my mom said if you didn't give it to me today, you get a big red X.

Me: Gee, she's nice.

**Setting: The 3****rd**** floor, at my locker**

Me: Here's the check.

Madeleine: NO BIG RED X FOR YOU!

Me: K.

Madeleine walks away.

Me: She's so WEIRD…

Nick: Hey.

Me: HAPPYYY BIRTHDAYYYY! Did Natalie say anything? xD **(A/N: Natalie is this creepy girl at our school that stalks Nick because she's, like, in love with him.)**

Nick: DON'T MENTION IT! Man, I hate her!

Me and Kellie: *Cracking up*

Me: BYEE

Steffo/Crona: I have Ms. Holland today.

Me: YAY! I won't be alone.

**First period AGP**

Mrs. M: Ok, its SSR, take out your books.

*Everyone's reading for the whole period*

**Second Period Orchestra**

Ryan: Hey.

Me: Hi?

Ryan: ?

Me: Whatever…

Me: Why are you two walking up those stairs?

Ryan and Max: OHSHITTTTTT IT'S WEDNESDAY! **(A/N: On Wednesday there's a HUUUUGE 6****th**** grade class in our room before us, and they come down the stairs at the same time we go up, so we go up the out of use staircase on the other side.)**

Me: RUN! *sprinting*

Max: They really can't move the garbage bags and cargo pusher from before the stairs?

Me: *jumping over the cargo pusher with my violin* Our school is a bastard.

Tina: At least we got through.

Me, Max and Ryan: HOLYSHITT! Where'd you come from!

Tina: The stairs…?

Me: Whatever, let's go before all the children can't open the door for us. **(A/N: The door is locked from the outside.)**

Alexa: *up there banging on the door*

Me: MARINAAA! Get OVER HERE AND OPEN THE DOOR!

*she comes and opens the door*

Me: Thanks…

Marina: No problem…

Mrs. F: Ok, so you guys have to listen to this new piece.

*We listen to it*

Mrs. F: Ok, now we're going to play it. First violins first.

Me: WHAT! Grrr- whatever.

Me, Amy and Athena:*Playing like dead cats cuz' we're so tired*

**Third Period Science**

Dr. Crackhead: Ok, so we're doing an activity called The Red Disease.

We do the activity….

Dr. C: Ok, you can leave now.

**Fourth period math**

Ms. S: Okay kids, we're having a quiz now!

Everyone: *under breath* F*** you…

*Everyone taking quiz*

Me: (Finished) That quiz… was so easy.

Nick: I'm still taking it.

Me: I would be, if I didn't fix the eraser THAT YOU PULLED OFF!

Nick: hahahahahahahahaha.

Me: Bastard.

**Fifth period Technology**

Rachel: Kayleigh, doesn't it seem a little dangerous to put burning hot glue on a piece of paper?

Me: No.

Rachel: Yes it is!

Me: IT'S NOT!

Rachel: FINE, I'LL GO ASK MR. T! MR. T! IS PUTTING BURNING HOT GLUE ON A PIECE OF PAPER DANGEROUS?

Mr. T: No. How would that even remotely be dangerous?

Me: Oh! Oh! Oh oh oh oh oh!

Rachel: So-

Me: OH! WHAT NOW, BITCH!

Rachel and Kellie: *Anime sweat drop*

Me: Just finish your boxes.

Me: MR. T! I need you to approve my ideas.

Mr. T: Okay, hit me.

Me: Okay, so my first idea: You're in a building and there's a serial killer after you. You have to answer questions to get to the roof to win!

Mr. T: Okay… Go on….

Me: My second idea: You're stuck in a desert with no water. You have to be the first person to get to the end by answering questions!

Mr. T: My, you're a little morbid, don't you think?

Me: No.

Mr. T: I like the desert idea better.

Me: Awwwwwhhhhhh…

Mr. T: Okay, so here's the paper for your box. I taught the class how to do this yesterday.

Me: *All dejected* Okay…

Steffo: So…?

Me: HE REJECTED MY SERIAL KILLER IDEA! D:

Steffo: NUUUUUU… That was a good idea!

Me: I know, right?

**Sixth period English**

Mrs. Mil: Okay, guys, we'll be reading chapter 6 of My Brother Sam Is Dead.

Me, Kellie, Dylon, Maimuna, Marina: Mrs. Mil, we finished chapter 6. Can we go outside?

Mrs. Mil: Sure. Read chapter 7.

Kellie: *outside* Did you actually read chapter 6?

Me: Psh, no.

Kellie: Me neither. But I HATE class reading. All the idiots always read and it's SO SLOW!

Me: Right?

Random 5th grader: *yelling jibberish at random 5th grader 2*

Everyone: *under breath* Shut up…

Me: *Yelling* SHUT UP KID!

R5thGrader1: Heyy… You don't even know me and you're telling me to shut up?

Me: Yeah. Shut up and get out of here!

Kellie: I hate little kids…

Everyone: I know, right?

Me: We should probably read.

Maimuna: Yeah, we'll get in trouble.

(6th graders get let out of class)

Everyone: ARE YOU FRIGGIN KIDDING ME!

Me: It's time to leave…. Already…

**Seventh period Lunch**

Me: *Le gasp* WHAT DID THEY DO TO OUR TABLE?

Madeleine: What?

Me: Look… At… Your…. Seat.

Madeleine: THEY TOOK OUR TITLES OFF! **(A/N: We wrote in Sharpie our titles and fake names on our seats.)**

Me: Clara ain't gonna be happy.

Madeleine: Nope.

Maimuna: WAIT! I still see some of mine!

Me: Ok, that confirms that they didn't switch it.

Lunch person: Go eat…

Everyone: *Sprinting*

Skip 10 minutes

Me: I'm so hungryyyy….

Madeleine: *gone*

Me:…? Where'd Madeleine go?

Nora: I don't know.

Skip 10 minutes

Madeleine: The Queen is back!

Me: No one gives a shit.

**Eighth period Social Studies**

Mr. O: Come pick your vocabulary word… (to class)

Everyone: *Picks their vocabulary word*

**I fell asleep after this…**

**Author's Note! Hi! SOrry for posting the first chapter EXTREMELY LATE. Fanfiction has a waiting thing of 5 days. Anyway, Enjoy! I won't be posting this all next week, due to the fact that I'll be in Florida. Ok? See ya guys!**

**Read and review, Pweeeeaseee? C:**

**-Tehflycat**


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